Don't Fade, Don't Evaporate

Hey guys,

Over 100 people viewed my bloggy in one day! Thank you so much! 
Malaysia. I see you. ;) 

Anyway, I am halfway through this fast and I couldn't be more happier. I am ready for some meat, but I do have...one thing I would like to share that's been on my heart for the past two days.

God is teaching me to open my mouth.

To a third world country, I am blessed. To an everyman here in the US. I am dead in the water. I feel like I could be homeless. At this point in my life, I am struggling.

Struggle. It's a word that I've heard and experienced a lot. I'm the conductor on the struggle train.

I think that God is finding me desperate. I don't have a lot of money and I'm used to that. Not only does the fast stop me from buying normal groceries, but stuff in general. I think that I am learning to do without. Which I have never had to do. Not for a long time, anyway. Now, I am working on campus and it's not enough. Last week, I applied for food stamps and I was turned away. My hopes were so high but no dice. Not too sound like Oliver Twist, but it's good for me. My ego and pride sometimes serve as a brick wall in front of me. God is just taking it down, brick by brick. 

It hurts but I need it. It's like taking that band-aid off to cleanse your wound. I cry, but I know I am growing spiritually. It just sucks sometimes. I want to have money but maybe I wouldn't learn with everything provided for me. I don't know. If you want, comment and tell me what you think.

Did I tell you that I am in a poetry workshop and I love it? Because I totally do and I wish all of my classes were workshops! :) 

Loving it. Anyways, I am still searching for jobs here and I looked in Austin for jobs.

Thousands upon thousands. I was blown away.

This is my last semester here and I can't wait to see what is next.

I will def miss my church but there is so much more opportunity in the city. 


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