Reality Strikes! Hard! So hard!

Hello, everyone!

:)

So, big news and boring news. Just kidding. It feels like it's been too long, but it hasn't been. No way!! Mid way through the semester, and I'm so happy about that. I'm sure that all the kids skipping classes are too. Like, it's pretty bad. Poor. Attendance! What is my teacher going to do? 

Fail you. Sucks.

Not me, though! I always burn the midnight oil, but I make sure to attend class. You always miss something and my teacher has a tendency to give quizzes every week. Every Friday to be exact. You know I'm all in my seat on time. I can't miss a class. 

That's the boring news. So, I've been getting into several fashion items lately! First of all, trouser socks!

Adorable! I love them! I went to Wal-Mart and got a 5 dollar pack! Look at meeeee!

In one of my favorite textures! Polka dots! Okay, so dots are so so popular right now, and I couldn't be more happier! So, like stuff that I've always loved and wanted to see in stores have came into the light. By stuff, I mean fabrics, textures, and styles. Here's a list of things that I remember have been popular in the past decade:

• plaid!
• polka dots!
• lace!
• punk style/DIY style!
• Native American gear [waiting forever!!]

Yeah! That's right! So, here's to the future and seeing dark blues everywhere. I seriously want an ombre dark blue-to-white infinity scarf. Tomorrow! I'm going to Austin at noon to see this radical band:

EISLEYYYYY!!!

For the 2nd time! My sister is going with me! I couldn't believe my ears when she said she was going along! Good times, and I promptly sent her links to my favorite songs. :D Teehee!!! I can't wait. It's going to be fun! So cheap, too! 16 bucks. 

Tegan & Sara were 44. T___T Why are Canadians so expensive?

JK.

When I was at my sister's I went to F21 and bought these cute things:

Bows & I finally have a braided headband again. :') It's been too long. My Native American one broke. In my hands. Catastrophic. Also, I bought the beautiful glass sprays from Victoria Secret. I think that the bottles make them more pretty and different than just the bigger plastic spray bottles. They look like this:

Sheer Love smells so good. Teehe! And I got Pure Seduction. Best. Smells. Ever.

Remember when I submitted to this site? Well, here I am!!!

Alllll, in it. I am finally glad I had the guts to submit on there. 

The serious news. I dropped my Physiology class today because I wasn't doing good at all. It's my second time taking it and I just wanted to make a high enough grade for the nursing program. So, I talked to my adviser for next semester and this summer and I asked her this: "Should I apply for this program?"

....

I am going to change majors. It has been a long, hard road for me. I feel like I'm going in circles with nursing. I'm terrible at science and math and it's been an uphill battle ever since I started. I thought this was the way. I thought this was it for me. So wrong. I spent 4 years being something I'm not. A nurse, that is. It's going to be hard to give up this ghost quickly. I dropped phys this morning, and when I got home I dumped all of my papers and lab notes from the past semesters. Honestly, it felt so good. I feel the burden leave my heart.

I don't know what to do with my life.

My mom actually prayed about this. About me. She saw me going back and forth to the computer lab late at night and it worried her. The reason I was going was because my teacher would give us 80-136 questions in one homework assignment!! Insane! He would put it up online, and give us like three days to do it! Also, here recently, he has been putting two at a time and making them due on the same day. -____-  My lab-mates told me he was the hardest teacher in the subject and a small percentage actually pass. I was in some deep trouble. Out of it now! Here I am. 2012. I'm praying about it. God knows where to put me. I am not transferring. I am not moving from San Angelo. I was put here for a reason. I think this step was the hardest thing I've ever done. To be real with myself, and know when enough is enough. I can't pass phys, and Microbiology & Pathophysiology is next. What am I supposed to do? I don't want to be in college forever.

So, I'm making a list. Things I like and would see as a career someday. I have a lot of thinking to do. At least I have summer to look forward to. I had an answered prayer because I read that dropping affects your financial aid and when I talked to the people in charge of that today, they said no! Yay, praise God! 

I dropped it like it's hot. 

But, seriously, I really don't know what I'm doing. God knows. He always know. Thankfully. My adviser was saying maybe I can major in psychology? 

I don't want to. I mean, I am not good with kids, and I don't want to be a teacher...what do you go with that? One of the things I am very concerned about is job placement. With nursing, you know you will have a job. That's a given. A straight shot to the hospital, or clinic. I mean, there isn't a doubt, but with other majors...ehhhh. My advisor is an economics major and she works in the nursing dept. Like...what? I want to work in my field. Not as a teacher, though. Something...cool. Something that says "Rachel!"

So, I'm going to take this weekend to relax and clear my head in Austin. Regroup and come back determined. It scares me that I don't have a solid major. But this video really struck home tonight for me. It's about just living life with no regrets and diving into the deep end of pool.

When reality strikes, it strikes so hard.

Don't touch the positive with the negative end. 

♥ and ideas,

Rachel